Im in whoville <3
Aussie version of JAWS
love it <3
Okay Ladies, bring out the mascara, straightener...
My head hates me!! =(
It is not enough for a man to learn how to ride; he must learn how to fall.– Arabian Proverb
If the French were really intelligent, they’d speak English.– Wilfred Sheed
All the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening.– Alexander Wolcott
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of...– Redd Foxx
I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don’t...– Jean Cocteau
‘I’m youth, I’m joy,’ Peter answered at a venture,...– Peter Pan
Ten Ways To Get In Shape To Own A Horse
Drop a heavy steel object on your foot. Don’t pick it up right away. Shout “Get off,stupid! Get off!” Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice “Relaxing into the fall”. Roll lithely into a ball, and spring to your feet! Learn to grab your checkbook out of your purse/pocket and write out a $200. check without even looking down. Jog long distances carrying a...
I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems...– Gilda Radner
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced.– Frank Zappa
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted...– Abba Eban
I am buried halfway up to my waist in crap. Not literally at least. Mums decided to rip everything out of our spare room’s cupboards and re- organise them. Again. The last time she did this we ended up taking two trips to the dump. Discusting. Anyways, this arvo, i spent about an hour and a half dragging a brush through my dogs fur. Didnt finish though, ‘cause he kept complaining and...
For what the horse does under compulsion, as Simon also observes, is done...– Xenophon quotes (Greek historian, author of the Anabasis, BC 431-350)
The child who ran weeping to you with a cut finger is now brought home, smiling...– Pam Brown
Jack Sparrow: [Wakes up and sees Elizabeth burning the rum] No! Not good! Stop!...
*sigh*, finally back home. I love that exhausted, tired yet satisfying feeling. It may be the aching of my joint or the fluttering of the heart, but it gives me a reason to enjoy the travelling between houses. Anyways, now that I’m back home, I can finally really get back to work, who knew it was so difficult to do h’work at Dads? Oh! Dads was soo fun! Lots of movies, lots of boating...
[empties bottle of rum] Why is the rum always gone? [stands up and staggers...– Jack Sparrow
The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’ve got it...– Jean Giraudoux
How to interpret classified horse ads
BIG TROT: Can’t canter within a two mile straightaway NICELY STARTED: lunges, but we don’t have enough insurance to ride him yet TOP SHOW HORSE: won a reserve champion 5 years ago at a show with unusually low entries due to tornado warnings HOME BRED: knows nothing despite being raised on the back porch BIG BONED: good thing he has a mane and tail, or he would be mistaken for...
A Horse's View of the World
Arena: Place where humans can take the fun out of forward motion. Bit: Means by which a rider’s every motion is transmitted to the sensitive tissues of the mouth. Bucking: counterirritant Crossties: Gymnastic apparatus. Dressage: Process by which some riders can eventually be taught to respect the bit. Fence: Barrier that protects good grazing. Grain: Sole virtue of...
Top 10 Horse Spook List
10. Blowing Paper “At any moment it could whip up into our faces, covering our noses. We could suffocate. And don’t try to tell us you’d do CPR.” 9. Barking Dogs ” What? You’ve never read Steven King’s CUJO?” 8. Puddles of Water “Quicksand.” 7. Trash Cans “They’ve been known to swallow horses and transport them into...